Sunday, 25 November 2012

The first cut

There's the temptation to think that, when you give birth, that is The End. The Happy Ending. But its more true that it's opened up a new plotline in my life - a new act, a new chapter.

I've been in my current part time job for a while. Years, in fact. On the plus side, it was fairly easy to get things done when I was going through IVF. On the minus side, there is little progression, and if I stayed there, little is going to change.

Another big minus is that, if I stay with my longstanding employers, I'm a bit stuck, location-wise. Where we stay now is fine for two adults, and it's even ok for a toddler. But sooner or later the Boy is going to want to play in the street and have a bit more freedom, and that's not really something that we can provide him with where we are.

I suppose, in all parts of my life, the old arrangements have served us well for a while - I occasionally still feel enthusiastic about my job, and I like our house. But even before the IVF worked I was becoming more and more ready to move on - in fact, one of the more frustrating things about it was being stuck in limbo. The uncertainty about treatment and the clinic was like a big anchor holding our lives in position. And now that anchor has lifted, and we are beginning to be pulled along by the current.

We have begun what could be a long, slow process of rearranging our entire lives.I've got another part time job. One that isn't so tying to a specific area.

There's going to be lots of other things we need to do - my husband needs another job. We need to sell our house and buy another, possibly renting along the way. We will need to make friends and fit in with our new community, wherever that may be.

It will take months to finish the process, at least. Possibly more like years - and that's even if you ever really get to a point to in your life, where you live in a house and like your job and nothing else will happen until you retire. Change is part of modern life. And, from having gone through years of repetition and stagnation, I'm both enjoying this phase of change and looking forward to what will happen next.

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