Jusqu à la fin

I stopped blogging a few monhs back out of paranoia and the fear of jinxing things. I had a largely uneventful pregnancy up until 38 weeks - my placenta shifted back into place, the UTI cleared up - and I was worried that if I stuck up a post saying everything was fine, that I'd curse myself into having some sort of massive drama.

As it happened, I did have a, not massive, but medium to largish sized drama at the end - pre-eclampsia, a very messy delivery, and some complications afterwards. It's worth a post in itself.

Most importantly, I ended up with a beautiful little girl as a result.

While I still worry that Something Bad will happen, she's perfect to us. She's a little over a week old, has been feeding well, smiles gently at us and is incredibly dainty. At least until she farts.

The Boy's taken it all reasonably well - we're giving him plenty of one on one time, as well as spending a lot of family time together, all four of us.

The cat is pretty hacked off, but harder to placate.

As well as being head over heels in love with the Girl, I'm also relieved. I've either had fertility issues hanging over my head or been confronting them since my first ectopic, 17 years ago.

I'd hung on to some of my meds from the last round, and last week I threw them all in the bin, disposed of my sharps boxes, and e-mailed our outcome form to the clinic. It was a good feeling.

At the last midwife appointment I was asked if I needed contraception, then the midwife interrupted herself and said "No, I guess not for the moment, eh?"

I cheerily told her no, I wasn't going to need any ever. For the first time, the no tubes thing felt like a positive rather than a negative.