Sorry for the absence.
What happened was, I did the IVF cycle and froze everything. I then went off and did the thing that I last blogged about. This all ended up in tears because, y'know, you can't have young (ish) women going around running things and pissing off old men.
So then I got on with IVF. This went swimmingly at first - pregnant on the first go, everything looked fine. I got past the point of all my previous losses and was beginning to relax.
The hcg checks were fine, the 8 week scan was fine, I was being sick everywhere, all good.
Except then I got to my 12 week scan and there was no heartbeat.
So it was all a bit shit.
I then, after a few days, got a surgically managed miscarriage (waiting days was torture, but I've discovered that in some places they make you wait a fortnight, which must be horrendous).
Mentally, I'm not as bad as I was in the olden days after losses. Having the Boy means that things could be a lot worse.
I also think that some of the behaviours learned from previous losses, and I suppose a much lesser expectation that things will be ok, means you've less far to fall.
Some things I had forgotten about though - we've got another two embryos to go and I'd forgotten what a pain in the arse it is not knowing what you're doing from month to month.
But anyway, that's where I am. I hope to be back blogging a bit more regularly but we'll see what happens!
